new series: glimmers of the internet
finding beauty in the digital wilderness
this post might be too long for email, if you’re at the end and it doesn’t look like the end, please read the rest in substack / browser - thankuuu <3
I'm currently trying to fight doomscrolling and be more intentional with my media intake. A blue-light diet of sorts. More nutrition-dense, less empty bytes. Instagram feels soul-sucking and useless, as if they've amped up addiction triggers in their code since the beginning of this year. I feel so uninspired on that platform but somehow get sucked in a few times a day as if pulled by invisible strings. Its giving pre-burn out stage: my attention fractured into a thousand pieces, mental energy draining into a void that returns almost nothing of value. The neurological toll of constant stimulation with barely a wisp of genuine connection or inspiration to show for it.
I do still love TikTok, where it's easy for me to indulge for 15 minutes in my perfect paradise of a highly specific algorithm and then, stop. Substack delivers for medium and occasional long reads. YouTube gifts me gems like old documentaries and cultural critics.
In this new series, I want to share the glimmers of the internet with you, according to me, obviously.
here we go
I deeply enjoyed this Miranda July narrated documentary about a couple that is obsessed with vulcano’s (disney+, prime, apple tv):
what soothes my brain while vacuuming
No one other than the iconic Gabby Windey. Her almost abstract but zeitgeisty hour-long rambles on Long Winded soothe my brain while providing me with hyper focus that usually only Ritalin or an ice bath can achieve. I didn't know her before gabbixhopecore got presented to me on my carefully curated TikTok for-you page that I built with my bare hands, brick by brick.
Apparently she was on the Bachelor(ette?) but now she's married to a woman and I love how hot, funny and authentic she is.
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perfume as language and emotion
Perfume has held me in its spell since I was 7 years old. I'd collect tiny bottles and samples like precious gems, creating chaotic laboratories where I' d mix and blend. I remember these vicious-smelling mixtures transforming into milky white potions when I added water, not understanding why I could never create a see-through potion.
The garden became my source material. I'd crush herbs between my palms, extract oils from petals, and harvest grasses for their sharp green essence. I remember getting rashes from essential oils and cut grass, too young to understand the word allergen.
In high school, when I couldn't maintain a consistent journaling practice, I found another way to preserve time. I pledged to myself: one signature perfume for each school year. A sensory archive of memories, bottled.
I still have all 6 of them locked in a box somewhere (I can only remember Marc Jacobs Daisy and Gucci Envy now). I'm fascinated by how scent bypasses our rational mind to trigger emotions and memories so directly. When people describe fragrance, they're forced to invent a language that is it’s own blend of poetry and precision. It’s often witty, evocative, unique . It's intelligence expressed through sensation rather than logic. That is why I love listening to creators on perfumetok or perfume podcasts.
In my last soft glow substack post I share my favourite perfume reviewers:
and here is a podcast I listened to this week about scents. I love these two but if you want to skip the general yapping, after about 30 minutes they get into the perfumery of it all.
future self visions that ignite my inner glow
I rarely think about when I'm older, like, more than a decade. I'm low key scared of my 40s as most women are scared of their next decade because of internalised patriarchal conditioning.
But the thought of being 80? Clear headed and physically well? Fashionably fabulous and doing whatever I want with my days? (which is hopefully yapping with girlfriends, writing hours a day, making music with people, hosting events that bring people together, spending lots of time with animals, visiting my futuristic wellness space regularly with friends)
It makes me feel like a warm, buzzy, soothing ball of love expands inside of me. I LOVED reading this article about this 80-year-old fabulous man and his daily journaling practice:
the party 4 u phenomenon that haunts me
Yesterday I found myself scrolling the comment section of the new "party 4 u" videoclip.
If you're not aware of the context: Charli took over the whole music industry last year with her album BRAT. Five years earlier, she came out with "party 4 u." It didn't get picked up until this spring, when people took the autotune acapella part of the song and created TikToks of how the song made them feel, or how they interpreted what Charli meant.
The part of the song is perfect for tiktok, it keeps on looping in your brain for days. In general, people interpreted the music as seeing something in public that makes your heart drop.
Like seeing your ex again after years and you feel that familiar feeling of deeply knowing someone but everything is different now and there is no way for the connection to resume.
Or losing your best friend without closure.
Or the beginning stage of a relationship and the moment you understand you projected a fantasy upon them and the spell broke.
The clarity strikes like thunder: it's never gonna work (again). Emotions pour like rain through your body, washing you into invisibility, into cloudlike nothingness. I am numb now, because I don't exist. Not enough for the other person, anyway. It's the feeling of losing a beautiful fantasy. The feeling of what could have been. Something transmuted to a form that has no way of morphing back. That grief, that disappointment, is what people have beautifully caught in this tiktok trend.
Last week was the 5 year anniversary of the song and charli blessed us with a pretty metaphorical videoclip. but please make sure to first check out some of the best party 4 u toks:
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I highly enjoyed this peek into one of Elsa Peretti’s inspiring homes in Spain
Since we currently live in times where seemingly most people think naturally derived, unregulated supplements are more effective and less harmful than thoroughly tested pharmaceuticals, I enjoy reading articles by people who are more critical. Like this personal account of a New Yorker on over-the-counter St. John’s Wort (also enjoyed the comment section).
I don’t understand we live in 2025 and most websites are boring. In the 00’s, they were still interesting and original. this is some modern website design i stumbled upon and loved.
I’ve finally started watching Bella Freud’s (yes) visual podcast Fashion Neurosis. Here she’s interviewing Rick Owens:
Interesting note on Joan Didion’s diary that was published last month:
https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/1998/11/09/last-words-6
I watch grwm's when I need distraction from serious stuff or just to calm my brain down. I took some notes on contouring and eye kohling from the beautiful bella hadid:
I enjoyed this video on surrealism, David Lynch and Carl Jung:
I've been very much into antidotes to the madness of rushing, grinding, girlbossing these days - without falling for tradwifery, conspirituality wellness, or other alt-right pipeline stuff. It feels like a tightrope walk between embracing feminine energy and maintaining healthy skepticism (not always easy to navigate!) . Along this delicate path i've been loving this channel:
As a fulltime model I had private pilates lessons 4 times a week - along with 2 other models - for a few years to “stay in shape” (which is model agent jargon for being underweight and toned) for my career. Despite the pressure of my measurements, I felt mentally clear and my body was stronger than ever. I still love it (classical, not lagree) and even wrote a business plan in 2016 with an entrepreneurial friend for a modern pilates studio in amsterdam when there were none. Funny to see how pilates is booming now globally in big cities around the world. It’s certainly cult-y these days and I loved watching this video about that:
If you’re into fashion, you need to know your classics. here is a breakdown of the iconic Antwerp Six - Walter Van Beirendonck, Ann Demeulemeester, Dries Van Noten, Dirk Van Saene, Dirk Bikkembergs, Marina Yee :
There is so much to say about self improvement. Some say it’s a capitalist, toxic fever dream that never ends and will inevitably lead to depression, some say it’s a catch 22, some say it’s the meaning of life, or it’s mere physics to grow and improve as a human being. Here is one take on the (long and lonely) journey of self improvement that gained some traction on substack:
ending on a high note, with some inspiration to exercise your free will:
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I hope you enjoyed, I know the audience on here is still small, but it would mean the world to me if you’d like or share the post and let me know how often you’d ideally receive this series in your inbox:
until next time! <3
xoxo Romy